nostalgia

This map brings back 10 years worth of memories. Ten full years of random and exciting and dangerous memories. There are so many of them. and this place...its so far away from me now.

At the top of the map (north) there is the town of Petaluma. I moved there when I was in the third grade in 1989. It was right after the big earthquake that rocked Northern California. So no, I never felt an earthquake when I lived there. If youre the type thats into earthquake stuff. The big fault up there is the San Andreas fault. You might notice on the map a big triangular piece of land thats all green. That is Point Reyes National Seashore. San Andreas fault is slowing moving that whole piece of land north. You can pick out the divide if you look closely. They say it will be up near Alaska in a few billion years.

Petaluma is about 45 miles north of San Francisco. At the bottom right corner of the map is where the Golden Gate Bridge crosses the San Fransisco bay into the City. Its marvelous. The big body of water on the right is part of the Bay. and the water on the left is the Pacific Ocean. Yeah! Pacific Ocean! Surfing right?!? Well yes, but its cold. The ocean up near San Fran varies by about 6 degrees year round. It hovers around 54 degrees. You need to wear a wetsuit if youre going in. And people do. At the botton of the map, you might notice "Stinson Beach" Thats a good surfing spot. In fact, there was a shark attack there when I was in about 6th grade. Off the coast is one of the best breeding and feeding areas of sharks. Yeah! My poor mother, she was always petrified when I went to the beach to do various activities.

On the right you might notice Highway 101. Great highway. As one drives south into sanfran, it becomes like six lanes all curvy and ups and downs. traffic moves pretty fast and the drivers are crazy. I learned to drive crazy as a result. Well...and also driving out to the beach. We lived about 30 minutes from the ocean and there are some of the funnest roads going out there. Often, after school we would just drive out there. Maybe park at a cliffs edge and watch the sunset or listen to the ocean waves crashing. It would be a regular occurrence to see business men from the city to be out on the beach during sunset with their shoes off and ties loosened just relieving some pressure of the day.

I particularly loved driving out to Point Reyes, or thereabouts. Point Reyes is an amazing place. One could get lost in there for a few days at least. There are waterfalls that fall right on to the sand like 100 ft and then carve out mini grand canyons in the sand after every high tide. There are hundreds of sea lions that hang out in the hard to reach coves. There are sea shells, there are mountains and ferns and trees and trails that they have to trim the undergrowth away just so one can hike through a gauntlet of greenery.

Theres little coastal towns that have such a fresh salty smell and usually foggy brisk mornings. Saltwater candy is sold, oysters, crab. I would go 'poke-poling' for crabs on jetties of rock and then boil them up at our sandy campsites. Skimboarding and boogie boarding were regular past times. If you ever happen to make your way into my Nebraskan living room, you will see my trusty skimboard hanging on the wall. Theres not much use for it anymore.

And that sharp point out at Point Reyes... There is a lighthouse there. Oh the beauty and wonder of that lighthouse. We would meet people there from all over the world to come to that point to whale watch. There is something like 300 steps one has to walk down to get to the actual lighthouse. Men of old would make that treacherous trip in 80 mph winds to light the old lantern.

Then there is Mount Tamalpias to the south. One can see this mountain from the city. And the trails there are amazing. I loved going backpacking there, or biking. I will never forget, on a 3 day backpacking trip, we were hiking through the dense trees and came into a clearing only to find an outdoor amphitheater where sound of music was being acted out! Such is the analogy of these places around northern California. There are so many little treasures hidden. So much beauty.

And thats just around the area. There are also redwoods to the north, Napa valley across the way, mountains to the east beyond the central valley where fruit grows enough to fill pharaohs storehouses. There was whitewater rafting, and snowboarding. There was random road trips and the Sunday afternoon drives. There was the near perfect weather all summer of 60-70 degrees. The fog, the rain, the occasional snow. The smell.

Its all back there. And often, i am taken back. I am reminded of it and daydream of those memories constantly. For ten years I was there and never had a dull weekend. And people have no idea. No one really knows the memories I have dwelling right under the surface. And its such a strange feeling. Simply put: a nostalgia of permanent proportions that has woven into every aspect of my life. But the regret and longing to return is not overwhelming. There is contentment in it all. I will always remember returning to Nebraska to go to college and when i did tell people I was from California (which was rarely), they gave me this look of utter confusion. "why are you in Nebraska?" Ha! I would laugh inside...if only you could understand. Then came graduation and friends moving. Everyone moved away it seemed. To Oregon, New York, Chicago, Montana, Germany, Phoenix, Washington, and even California. They have this itch. They hate it here. Well let me tell you a secret: people hate it there too. Everyone seems to hate where they are from.

But I, I dont really have that itch, just the duality of having lived it all once...a long time ago it seems. I am thankful for the contentment and the memories.